The Weekend

Well.

I'm just not sure what else to say.

I'm fairly speechless although there is so much turmoil within that I don't know how I can NOT blog. Been there?

Do I blog about the experience of babysitting my best friends little boy who has autism? I am endlessly honored that she would trust me with her precious precious boy. I am frightened enough to leave my different little Bear with people that I can only imagine how much she fretted and worried over him while she was away. I felt so blessed to be the one she could ask. Little man is 8, and can mostly ask for the things he needs or wants but he also requires nearly constant attention. By Saturday's end, when I knew that K was only 15 minutes away, I was nearly in tears with relief that she'd be there soon, but also overwhelmed by guilt that this was something she experiences every. single. day. I had little man for 9 hours. 9 long hours of trying to just do the daily stuff I do on a sunny Saturday but not lose her son or allow him to destroy my house or hurt himself all at the same time. K is amazing. I always knew it, but now I KNOW it.

Do I blog about the mom of one of Buddy's teammates? The mom who whined the entire. stinking. game. about how her son was better as a pitcher than a catcher, that he was being wasted as a catcher. That if the coach thought her son was going to catch for 3 innings and then pitch that the coach had another think coming cuz her son wasn't going to ruin his arm by catching every ball and throwing every ball back to the pitcher only to then pitch an entire inning. The dad of the kid yelled at him the whole game. "Throw it D! Throw it! Don't hesitate!" "C'mon D! Throw it!" yadda yadda yadda. Did I tell you that these kids are 9 and 10? For some kids it is their first year in Jr. Little League, just coming up out of the Farm League. When she wasn't complaining about her son catching instead of pitching, she was critiquing every other kid. "bend your knees! Bend, bend!" "Raise that bat! Up, up, up!" "He doesn't know what he's doing! Why's he playing that position?" But she did it so that only the people surrounding her could hear. The dad would pace and smoke and yell at his son. ARGH! Next time I seriously need to sit FAR away from them. Far FAR away. My husband had to tell me more than once to lower MY voice, because I was quite getting fed up with those two! By the way, my buddy pitched almost 3 full innings and then caught for the last 2. He did a damn good job! He wasn't perfect, wasn't outstanding or awesome but he was damn good! He pitched once or twice last year and had only caught once so he was pretty new at the whole thing. He did us proud!

Do I blog about how this evening, between 7:40 and 8:00 pm, while I was finishing up tidying the upstairs and checking email, my Chick had her heart broken? Do I tell you that the person she loves cheated on her then told her about it and dumped her? Or do I tell you about the rage I feel that someone would so callously use my girl, and that my girl would cry and cry and cry but still refuse to actually be angry at that lying cheating two timing shit hole? I'm now angry at the lying cheating two timing shit hole AND my Chick. I did not raise her to sit around and let someone else use her like that! How could she not be furious? How could she not tell that person to go take a flying leap? Why?

So.

That was it.

My crazy weekend. It's a serene looking background here at STL, but my life is anything but.